Your mind is a productive partner but a horrible master. When you are in control of your mind things go better. When you are being controlled by your mind and your instincts, you lack free will.
Your smartphone is an extension of your mind. Whether or not you believe in the singularity–the connection between mankind and technology–some form of it applies today. If you disagree, try integrating yourself into society for a week without your phone. For modernized cultures, this is near impossible at worst, and highly inefficient at best.
In the early 2000s, the internet was a novelty. People would warn not to buy products online because you don’t know who is getting your bank information.
It took 20 years for the Internet to become a necessity for virtually all people. The digital world fights for your attention like a virus fights to replicate. You have to create your own (immune)system to prevent the digital world from over-monetizing you and taking you away from your goals.
Having infinite information in the digital world, where information and attention are currency, is giving an opium addict an opium farm. He could be productive, but human nature suggests he will get high all day; to the point of detriment, to the point of losing the farm, losing all of his opium.
All of The Knowledge of Mankind
Even with free courses from Khan Academy, Duolingo, and MIT Open courseware–free resources to learn anything you want–the attraction is Instagram and TikToks. Not to say these are bad. They just are. But think about how much time is spent on zero-return digital activity.
Be cautious that your phone does not become your master. Use your phone to access specific information that will help you along your path. Your path to your goals and the ideal version of yourself.
Below are indications your phone may be your master and not your partner. Farther below is what you can do about it.
1. You use your phone for more than an hour a day
Using your phone for one hour a day means 365 hours per year, or 15 days of your life wiped away just like that.
Statista conducted a survey where half of the responses indicated people use their phones for 5 to 6 hours a day. That equals 76 days a year. That’s almost 20% of your year spent scrolling and consuming.
Tech companies know this. But they don’t want you to know that 20% of your life is wasted being a product for advertisers. They give entertainment in exchange for life. At least vampires are honest when they steal life from you.
You need to distinguish between productive and non-productive phone activities. Spending six hours of screentime learning Math or a new language is a good use of your time.
Be cautious of “pop education”.
Reddit for “learning” is not learning because knowledge requires depth. “learning” on Reddit is no different than learning fun facts from candy wrappers.
Learning requires depth, not width. Use your phone for authentic progress.
Consuming topical information is not progress. And when you meet someone who has deep information about your topicals, your knowledge is inferior.
2. You “Check” too many times per day
review dot org surveyed 1,000 Americans and found the average American checks their phone 262 times a day. Once every 5.5 minutes. [1] Checking for business is different than checking for pleasure, but you shouldn’t need to check your phone in case you missed something.
Setup alerts or some process where you check your phone when you want to, not when it notifies you.
Open up your phone for nothing and you will inevitably find something to look at.
Most of the things you do in life will be hard. Hard things contain value because not everyone is willing to do them. If you love the path you are on, hard things become fulfilling puzzles. Needing to check your phone too often may be because the reality you inherited from your actions does not match your interests.
How many times is it reasonable to open your phone for your situation? When are you opening your phone? Is it appropriate to open your phone for no reason during a productive session on the path? Have a conversation with yourself from the perspective of parenting yourself. If you unlock your phone 50 times or more, why could that be 20 times instead?
Excessive checking will vary for individuals. Monitor if your phone behavior is hindering performance on your path.
3. You wake up with your phone
Your phone is not your lover; don’t sleep with it. Your phone is an assistant, and assistants should not sleep in the same bed, or the same room as who they are serving. The phone is a helpful butler/librarian/expert/operator/curator/arcade/movie theater; You wouldn’t sleep with, or at any of these places in the physical world; that philosophy needs to carry over to the digital world.
Having your phone in bed with you is too much power. The Egyptians worshipped Ra, the sun God, understanding that the sun provides all life. Most sunlight is blue light which is what your phone emits to keep you awake and engaged. Ra goes away at night to rest.
Having your phone in your room at night may be the prime cause of chronic fatigue & sleeplessness. Your brain is affected by blue light. When you hold your phone a few inches from your face in bed, your brain thinks you should still be awake.
You need to be the parent in the relationship with yourself. A child raising a child doesn’t work.
What to do about chronic phone use
Remove (or lock) apps
Remove what you chronically check that adds no value. Removing social media from your phone is a good, albeit extreme step. Some people need to use social media for their businesses and for keeping in touch. If you fall in that category set a limit for how long you can use each app. 20 minutes is a generous allowance to start with that allows more than enough time for posting and communicating but not enough to scroll forever.
If social media companies cared about your body mind or spirit, they would let us turn the feeds off.
If you delete your social media from your phone, allow yourself to check it once a day from your computer. Or once a week. You need to determine your allowance but understand that breaking these rules reinforces the need for them to exist. If you cannot stick to your social media schedule, understand you need it more, like a person with no time to meditate needs meditation.
Be cautious of digital locks because they tend to be unlockable. Some people who need extra help or who have children will purchase physical phone lock boxes when they need a timeout from tech.
Social media is addictive on purpose. Drugs are addictive as a byproduct of the effects they produce which is no different than social media. Companies have departments with hundreds, or thousands of jobs related to making their product more engaging.
Engagement = addiction
Making a social media app more engaging is the same thing as making cigarettes more addictive.
Use a screen timer
Social media companies do not share how much time you have spent with them. They know how you would feel when you realized you could have learned a new language, or found a new hobby, but instead stared at women you do not know on Instagram. [link]
You need to set up analytics to measure your time spent on social media and other distracting applications. Awareness is understanding. If you see how destructive your behavior is, emotions like guilt, which should never be ignored, will continually provide signals for change. Do not ignore painful emotions. They will not go away
on their own. They must be processed and understood to be absolved.
Most phones have screen-timers built in if you enable the
m. If yours does not, you can find an app for it. In an era of convenience, we must seek discipline on our own to avoid drowning in pleasure.
Create a phone hub in a different room
Have a station for your phone that is fixed in location and routine. When not using your phone you charge it at the station. This may be the only place you charge your phone at home–a good idea. Just put a brick into a kitchen outlet and let that be the permanent spot for your phone when you are home. Or if you need something with a little style you can get a phone docking station that acts as a catch-all tray for your pocket contents.
Remember to keep your hub out of your room or at the minimum out of reach. If you use your phone as an alarm you can keep it out of reach so you get out of bed to silence it. A sunlight alarm is a better option though.
Unproductive screentime is regret.
