Novelty is a survival mechanism to continue the human race.
This is why we love new experiences.
Traveling awakens the human need to migrate, when we needed to find new sources of food in the past. Humans migrated for many reasons, including avoiding foreign invaders, natural disasters, and other predicaments.
Humans who have skills thrive. Having a skill is an identity. What skills do you identify with now? What skills are you building, consciously or unconsciously, that do not align with who you want to be.
The desire to be good is the desire to be valuable to the group. Humans often base their value upon their hierarchical position among the groups they identify with. The further developed your skills, the more often you are likely you are to receive economic and socioeconomic benefits.
Given that humans are naturally defenseless against other species without tools, we make groups to better defend against outsiders of any species, even our own. Being alone is a vulnerability, and so is the inability to be alone.
Negative outcomes to situations creates the desire to adapt to avoid repeated negative outcomes.
The primal nudge to fit in is so strong that most would rather discard beliefs to fit into a group than be isolated and steadfast in one’s believes.
Be cautious of associations with groups or skill associations that no longer serve you. Be cautious of any association that no longer serves you.
Do not be afraid of change when the present is not serving the path and your identity. One change many men have to go through is changing friendships. Once you begin to create an identity around a mastery, those without masteries will try and keep you away from that mastery, because their identity is with you, and not with your new mastery. Some associations would rather hold you back to avoid being left behind, then promote your travel down the path.
When do you know it’s time to move on?
If you can’t stand the present, it must be changed.
If you are no longer acquiring new knowledge or skill development, it’s time to move on.
A samurai practices the way until his death.
Romance
There may be a time where you need to move on from a romantic relationship, and the signs may not be obvious, which is why meditating on your life is crucial to understanding it. One indication of needing to move on from a romantic relationship, is when you no longer want to acquire new knowledge with, or about, your partner. When you no longer care to teach and learn together.
If your relationship becomes entirely conventional and no longer novel, it may be time to move on. Understand that strong couples create and engage in novel experiences together.
Work
You may need to abandon your work when you no longer have goals associated with it, which often means you no longer have meaning associated with it. It’s respectable to do something just for the money, but it cannot be the only skill you practice; you must also follow a non-leisurely path that is for the meaning(and possibly the money, one day, someday).
What skills have you improved in the last year with your profession? If you aren’t better than you were last year, you may not care about this profession enough to improve, and if you don’t care you likely are not fulfilled.
Move forward with the world by walking on the path.
Location
The place you are born and raised in may be fine to live in forever, but the hero of every story, yours included, eventually left, even if they found themselves back eventually. Humanity is designed to migrate, and you will miss the full human experience if you do not migrate at least one time.
Staying in the same location can trap you with the same people which is fine if they are good people but your old friend-group from adolescence may not be good people for you. Meditate on this.
It’s easy to live in the same neighborhood because of momentum. Easy could work out for you, but often it is challenge that strengthens us.
Assimilation
Time is the most valuable resource you have and it must be wasted sparingly. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.
There are areas of your life that you will need to manually move forward by reduction or addition. Understand these situations can spawn anywhere–beyond location, work, or romance. understand when it is time to move on and do it.
Understand when it is time to move on
1 comment
“It’s easy to live in the same neighborhood you were born in…”
This line resonated with me. I grew up in a small suburb, and after I graduated high school it was tempting to live at home with my Mom because it felt “comfortable.” There was no stress. I was afraid to move out of this small town away from my friends and family.
It’s vital to punch fear right in the face, and this is exactly what I did. I moved across the country to New York City to explore. Three years later when NYC started to feel comfortable, I made the leap to live abroad in Spain and explore Europe for half a year.
You’re correct that if you’re over 18 years old and you live in the same town you grew up in…you need to drive. Get out of there. You need to grow. Excellent advice.